Didn’t think I could without drugs

I believe this is one of the greatest, most inspiring and powerful quotes from American spiritual teacher, author and lecturer Marianne Williamson.

First I’d like to start by saying I do believe western medicine absolutely has its place in certain situations. But at the same time I do believe in more holistic, natural methods of healing. Like Marianne Williamson, “we are powerful beyond measure” and for a long time now our power has been taken away from us, either consciously or subconsciously.

We’ve been brought up to believe that prescription drugs are the answer to better health and get rid of the symptoms quickly.

When in fact symptoms are an indicator of something much bigger happening.

They are teachers to help illuminate what’s truly going on in our lives at an emotional, mental and spiritual level.

We are our best healer and teacher.

The story I share I below is a short version. You’ll be able to catch the full story in my upcoming book :).

Nearly 7 years ago to the day (December 17, 2010) I had one of the most transformational experiences in my life. I really thought I wasn’t able to do it without drugs. I was brought up to believe that I wasn’t capable of doing it all by myself.

The birth of my first child was so traumitising that I told my husband the only way I was ever going to have a second child was if we went through private insurance.

It didn’t work the first time around and I was determined to have guaranteed working drugs (aka epidural).

So we did. We went the private route. Thankfully like my first, my second pregnancy went well – so much so that I was going to do another midwife-led delivery.

Despite all the planning and expectations, the Universe had something else in mind.

It started to snow that December London morning and my husband was driving extra carefully to the hospital. My contractions were coming so strongly, one on top of the other, and all I could think about was “please get us there in time”!

My husband dropped me at the private maternity ward and then went back to park the car.

He was gone no more than twenty to thirty minutes but it felt like forever. He nearly missed the birth of our son.

Because in truth, which my midwife didn’t dare want tell me on my arrival, was that I was already in full blown labour and in no way was there going to be time for my epidural.

I was going to have my second child au-natural.

I painfully cried thinking to myself,

“How am I ever going to do this without drugs?!”

But I did. And thankfully it was quick.

This time around I was completely wide-awake and able to hold him immediately. Unlike after the birth of my first, I nearly fainted, I couldn’t walk and I was so drugged up that it wasn’t at all the same experience.

And granted the pregnancy and birth of my second child came at a very difficult year.

That same year was when my father had brain tumour surgery and my mother was diagnosed with cancer.

I had seen them put so much of their faith in western medicine. It was always like that growing up.

But through my own personal experience I was able to completely change the trajectory of my limiting beliefs, and thus my life and the life of my children,

breaking generational patterns.

This experience empowered me to remember the power of myself – my body, mind and spirit.

It inspired me to drastically change my mindset and the perspective from which I choose to believe.

My wish to you Beautiful this holiday, new year and beyond…

May you also believe that “your playing small does not serve the world” and may you remember that you “are powerful beyond measure”.

Happy holidays to you and yours.

Much love and many blessings,

Leslie xx

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